The Last Temptation

You're almost there...you see the finish line. A check out lane with only one person in front of you and just a few items on the belt. You are so close. You've sucessfully gone through the store with two kids and got everything on your list. And you've managed to catch those things that weren't on your list but ended up in your cart by some strange unexplainable force of nature. (Why that force seems to always put PopTarts & gummies in the cart is just as big of a mystery!) You've forged through arguments over which cereal to buy and the whining of being "sooo bored" that started in aisle 3. There have been no casualties, which is a success in and of itself. And there it is...the finish line. You start to unload your cart onto the belt while watching the kids from the corner of your eye as they squat down looking at the display next to the lane. "No candy" you remind them, but they know that rule all too well and typically a simple reminder is all that's needed to sway off a battle. You're down to the bottom of the cart when that "wish was forgettable" tone of voice emerges from child 1..."mom, we haaavve to get this- I need it" he says as he holds up a matchbox car. (Becuase the 300 he already has aren't enough) What? A matchbox car? Then child 2 "mom, look at this, isn't it sooooo cute" she chimes as she holds up a small pet shop toy. Huh? Where did that come from? "No" you say forcefully and wish the cashier would scan a little faster. "But mom, it's sooo cute" "And mom, I don't have this car, look it's blue with gold wheels". "No" you say "You don't need a toy or a car" you reply looking desperately at the cashier trying to plead your case nonverbally to speed up the process. "Well, how about this Mom" child 1 chirps as he holds a pack of UNO cards. "We can play it together" (ahhh- now he's using the big guns- family fun, togetherness, how can a mother say no to that). "No" you say. "But Mom..." "No". Ok, can this cashier be any slower? And since when did we put toys and UNO cards at the check out??? Candy wasn't a big enough distraction? Man, do those marketing people know what they're doing when they stragically place items in a store. Hallelujah, you're almost done. If you can just make it through this evil lane of temptaion you'll be ok. You're starting to feel relaxed again when child 2 shouts "Oh, mom- we definitely need this" as she charges over with a Tide stain stick. "Haven't you seen the commercials for this? You put it in your purse and when we spill stuff on our clothes, this will take it off." she says with a big smile. You look at her dumbfoundly. It's not just the evil strategic shelving people in the grocery stores, it's evil marketers everywhere! You're child is a walking advertisement. Too tired to battle on, you smile and nod and throw the stain stick on the belt. And grab one of those stragically placed, overpriced, 12 oz bottles of diet coke on the belt too. Because at this point, you needed a coke and a smile.

Worry

It's 11:30 pm and my 8yr old son is having a difficult time falling asleep. This isn't a first. His mind just won't turn off. "I can't stop thinking" he says. I feel his misery. I, too, have trouble turning off my mind when all the lights are out and it's just the quietness all around. Why is it that that seems to be a wake up call for all your worries to dive from their sleeping places into the forefront of your mind? My son is a worrier, even at eight yrs of age. And he's been this way for some time. He worries about things like school and homework, and just as common I think, things like fire and robbers. But possibly more uncommon, he can also worry about starving children around the world, and people who don't have homes. Very sensitive indeed. So how do I help him put those worries aside? What tools can I give him? What can I say to calm his stress and anxieties? I try to comfort him best I can, I try to say sweet, calming words that will ease his mind. But still he tosses and turns. Part of my heart sinks as I listen from the bottom of the stairs to him trying to find a comfortable position to fall asleep, then hear pages turn in a book as he tries to make his eyelids too heavy to battle the wheels in his head that are turning. My heart sinks because I deal with anxiety. I am a worrier and tend to let it get the best of me in so many situations. It's been a struggle for a long time. What wires us this way, at such a young age? Is there a way to rewire? So my heart aches because I know this is going to be a challenge my son will battle his whole life. And I wish I could do a better job in helping him manage his worry. And so now...I worry.

So, my first blog... I don't know enjoyable or entertaining it will be for those who read it. I'm not very clever or witty and often times my deepest thoughts stem from how to get kids to eat veggies . But nevertheless... here I am in the blogging world. A free place to post my thoughts and opinions on whatever I please. :-)